Woman Who Picked Up Litter as a Kid Resentful of Greta Thunberg

Greta Thunberg has recently been credited with bringing the environmental crisis to the forefront of political discussion. However, according to Cassie Hendricks, Thunberg should be sharing credit with others. Hendricks, who was seen protesting the recent environmental protests, claims that she’s been doing this work since the early nineties, and is livid that someone else is taking all the credit. 

Hendricks, 37, who currently works for a number of apps and has some ideas for some apps of her own, claims that upon first hearing about the climate walkouts she was thrilled. It wasn’t until she learned their source that her excitement turned to agitation.

“For one girl to take all the credit is pretty gross. I was walking out of school all the time when I was sixteen. I just don’t feel it’s fair.” 

According to Hendricks, school walkouts aren’t where the commonalities between her and Thunberg end. As a child, Hendricks often picked up litter, and even started an environmental club, “Before caring about the Earth was the new avocado toast.” Hendricks claims that Thunberg owes much of her current success to trailblazers like herself.

“No one was doing it when I started. Everyone else was playing Nintendo, while I was single-handedly converting old oatmeal canisters into piggy banks. It was groundbreaking for a ten- year-old to do something like that, and it was the first group of its kind in Arvada, Colorado, as far as I know.”

Hendricks followed up by boasting about her low childhood carbon footprint, stating that her and her friends didn’t drive cars back then, but rather rode bikes everywhere.

“I’d still do it now, but it’s so dangerous and just takes a lot longer.” 

Hendricks was also quick to point out that Thunberg is being overly praised due to her age.

“She’s sixteen, which isn’t that young. I was doing some pretty amazing things at that age too. I’d like to see Greta do an ollie on a skateboard, or keep her cool at the choir concert after smoking an entire joint. Then I’ll be impressed.” 

Staring out her apartment window, opining about the fact that the smog affects everyone not just uptight sixteen year olds, Hendricks spoke of her attempts to maybe try to do something about global warming as an adult. She was, however, quick to point out the fact that it’s, “hard enough trying to get my friends to come see me playing with my cover band, Hootie and the No Means No Fish.” Hendricks says that if someone doesn’t even want to come here dope remakes like I Only Wanna Be With You (If That’s What You Also Want), then who would be willing to attend an event that’s basically about science? 

Hendricks’ isn’t letting Thunberg’s recent success bring her down, and her resiliency rages on. Most recently, she’s started a Facebook group called Adults Trying To Care. The group’s 13 followers make it a far cry from her Cats with Cleft Palates group, but she remains confident that the numbers can, “Only go up from here. Unless Facebook shuts down the couple of fake accounts that are following us.”

Image: Greta Thunberg-CNN

Lisa Laureta
Author: Lisa Laureta
Aspiring cartoon character Lisa Laureta is a writer, voice actor, animator, comedian and creator of Sock Karen, the problematic white sock puppet. She's worked with some really famous people which means she's special and important. www.LisaLaureta.com because when you're laughing, you're more bearable.