During this very strange socially distanced year, I’ve been obsessively wondering about people’s habits, since I’m not seeing people on the regular. I sent my lady friends a group text this morning: Question, are we still wearing bras? If so (or not)… why?! PS: This is not a bit. Just need info… about your bits. xo.
I was just about to settle in to some Dorothy, Rose, Blanche and Sophia (Golden Girls IS my weighted blanket) when my first text came in.
*Names have been changed to protect the (boobs of the) innocent.
R: I do not wear one unless I leave the house. So almost never.
R is the first to answer in this fashion, but not the only. Seems like there’s a big consensus of “Public Bras, Private Nahs.” And since R lives in California, where we are still partially sheltering in place, it seems like those undergarments are not seeing a ton of action. As I contemplate what we can do with all those unworn bras (build a hammock?) my phone pings again.
A: I have no boobs. So, I wasn’t wearing a bra to begin with!
I got some version of this response from all my lady friends who’ve never debated wearing two sports bras in a trampoline workout class (doesn’t really help). More power to you! Let it all hang out! Speaking of hanging, my phone pings again.
J: My boobs haven’t been above my waist since March. If I could learn to paint my toenails with my nipples, I could start wearing sandals again…
Resourceful, honest and hilarious. Just like my friend J.
I slowly look down at my bra covered boobies realizing I am the only person I know still wearing a bra. Every. Damn. Day. And I’m not entirely clear on why. Is it just routine, from years and years of wearing them? “The patriarchy?” A craving for the feeling of comfort? A feeling of accomplishment of at least “getting dressed” for the day?
As I reach back to unhook myself, one last text comes in.
N: Yes I do! Someone needs to carry these around!
I smile and leave my bra exactly where she is, letting her do the work for today. Besides, I have to go paint my toenails the old fashioned way.
