Author: Anna Snapp
It’s Confirmed! Not Even a First-Degree Burn is Worse Than People Who Talk on Speakerphone in Public!
Oh, honey. Oh, sweetie. How do I put this delicately? The worst thing that cellphones have brought us is the “art” of talking on speakerphone…
“Have You Worked Through Your Past Traumas?” And Other Fun Questions to Ask Your Dating App Match
That’s where we are, y’all. It is where. We. Are. No time for foolin’ around, no time for beating around the bush. You’re either in…
“Hot Girl Summer is Coming,” Says Woman Who Hasn’t Moved From Her Couch in a Year
Well, would ya look at that? Isn’t it just the consequences of our actions, am I right? This damn pandemic is getting the best of…
“Celebrating 624 and a Half Days Til We Get Married,” Says Woman Looking for an Excuse To Post Her Engagement Photos
You guessed it! Another woman on your feed has been caught trying to balance the desperate need to post her engagement photos, her desire to…
That Anti-Aging Serum Isn’t Going to Make Up for the Fact That an Entire Generation Hates the Way You Part Your Hair
So, you’re 30 years old. The Y2K days feel like yesterday, but they were really twenty years ago?! You feel assured about who you are…
My Friend Recommended This Non-Waterproof Mascara, Despite the Fact That I’ve Cried Every Day of This Pandemic
Wow, I’m hurt. I’m truly, truly offended. How dare she. How dare that (however awesome) friend in my life do something so evil, so malevolent,…
Woman Doesn’t Have the Strength to Untangle Necklace, But Can Definitely Get on Her Peloton
What is it? What is so damn hard about finding the #strength to untangle a necklace? I don’t know about you, but I usually try…
Breaking News! Generic White Man Believes His Below Average Comedy Set is Pure Genius
Reporters have been outside Broadway Comedy Club for hours, trying to get a lead on the story that has been not surprising to viewers nationwide….
Woman “Shocked” to Discover She Has Multiple Cavities, Hasn’t Gone to the Dentist Since High School
After years of avoiding the truth, local woman Lucille Phillips finally went to her twice-annual dentist appointment—for the first time in “ten-ish years.” Sources say…
Is He Hot, Or Was He Just Wearing a Nice Suit at That Wedding You Were Drunk At?
It’s called wedding eyes. Or maybe suit eyes. Who’s to say? But there is something miraculous about seeing a man in a suit…even if he…