Author: Tricia D'Onofrio
US Congress Thumb Wrestles Over Pandemic Aid
Although we’ve had months to get this figured out before the extra pandemic pay expired, we just couldn’t get our act together. That’s our bad….
Middle Aged Car Regrets Bumper Sticker From Youth
I got started with with a tribute to my grandma, who died in a bad accident with an 18 wheeler. After we paid our respects,…
Generic Woman With Generic Name Complains About Being Forgotten
Christina feels forgettable. She has evidence of this. Sometimes someone will smile at her and sincerely say, “It was so nice to meet you.” She…
Is It Just Me or Is Grandpa’s Vow Renewal Coming off as a Little Desperate?
Listen gramps, I just want to start by saying, You totally should live your best life….but I have to say that this whole vow renewal…
Brain Goes on Strike Until Demands of Basic Self-Care Are Met
The representatives from the Brain Union have declared that they are going to go on strike until their demands of basic self-care and nutrition are…
Middle Aged Man Can’t Believe His Waitress is Seeing Other Tables
I don’t want to be jealous or anything…but my waitress is seeing other tables. When I first started coming to this joint, I was seated…
Convicted Serial Killer Is Awkwardly Not a Tidy, Misunderstood Hottie
We’re coming live to you from convicted serial killer Justin Timmon’s house in the outskirts of rural Indiana. Justin is holed up in his duplex…
Dying Grandma Won’t Allow Visitors Because She “Doesn’t Look Hot”
Listen, sweetie, your ma told me you want to go visit nanna… The doctors don’t know yet. They’re doing tests. Tests, lots of tests. Let’s…
I Started a Technology Detox and Wound Up Amish
I am currently a viral Zoom sensation. I had to use the little girl’s room so I turned off my video and volume, but Zoom…
Tide Pods Clean Up Their Act, “We’re Vegan Now!”
In the meme yearbook, the class of 2017 will be remembered for a few notable alums including Salt Bae, White Blinking Guy, and of course,…