Category: FASHION

Posted in FASHION LIFESTYLE

Wait, If There’s a Vaccine, Does That Mean I Have to Start Going Out and Wearing Bras Again?

Well, I mean…it’s great. It truly is. This is the vaccine we’ve been waiting for, for a year. But somehow, you’re a little hesitant. Not…

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Posted in FASHION

Mole Pulls Ultimate Attention Seeking Move By Sprouting a Hair

I was born on a cheek. A face cheek, not…umm…nevermind. You see, when your skin cells grow, they usually spread out throughout the skin. My…

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Posted in FASHION

Who’s Gonna Tell My Beloved Spanx That I’m Never Gonna See Them Again?

Yesterday, while doing a deep dig through my underwear drawer (to avoid doing a load of laundry, so help me God!), my hand bumped into…

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Posted in FASHION

QUIZ: Are You Hot Enough to Fuck With Embroidery?

Embroidery is a delightful cottagecore trend that’s having quite the moment. But like all good things, this cozy craft has sadly been co-opted by one…

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Posted in FASHION NEWS

Science Confirms Wearing Enough Leopard Print Can Replace Self Esteem

While psychologist Rhonda Wilson was getting dressed one morning, she was feeling particularly insecure about putting anything on her body. Each article of clothing would…

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Posted in FASHION NEWS

About Time! This Designer Is Using Grimace as a Model to Celebrate Inclusivity

It finally happened: Grimace, the legendary and mysterious purple thing from the twisted minds at McDonald’s, will appear in Paris Fashion Week. Grimace will clomp…

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Posted in FASHION POLITICS

How to Pick Out the Perfect Outfit for the Impending Civil War!

Let’s be honest, things are kind of a mess right now. It’s been days since the election and we still have no winner. Nevada seemingly…

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Posted in FASHION LIFESTYLE

Woman’s Left Boob Totally Bringing A-Game Today

Witnesses confirmed that area woman Anna Schulberg’s left breast is in peak physical form today—it appears pert, round, and as though it is simply having…

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Posted in FASHION

Are People Still Wearing Bras? An Investigative Field Report

During this very strange socially distanced year, I’ve been obsessively wondering about people’s habits, since I’m not seeing people on the regular. I sent my…

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Posted in FASHION LOVE

Charcuterie Board Fills Emotional Void That No Man Could

It’s been…a hard seven months. In. So. Many. Damn. Ways. You had your birthday via Zoom in March, and another six for your friends since….

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