Category: LIFESTYLE

Posted in LIFESTYLE

Did Women Create The Pandemic to Punish Men? An “I’ve Been Drinking” Conspiracy Theory

I have spent a lot more time drinking while on the internet since the global lockdown was enforced, and I have unearthed some conspiracy theories…

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Posted in EW MEN FASHION LIFESTYLE NEWS

Wow! This Guy Makes Six Figures and Still Has Bad Hair

Some guys have large incomes, and some guys have bad hair. Carson Connors is a man who has both in spades. Carson, who rakes in…

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Posted in FOOD LIFESTYLE

Medical Professionals Say a Virtual Happy Hour a Day Will Keep Corona Away

Most of us are starving for dates with our friends to the local bar for five-dollar vodka sodas at 5:00 PM on a Tuesday, or…

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Posted in FASHION LIFESTYLE

Woman’s Mustache Announces Long Awaited Comeback Tour

It’s been seven years since anyone has glimpsed at Marianna’s mustache. After keeping a low profile—probably due to unwanted criticism from the unforgiving public—the ‘stache…

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Posted in FOOD LIFESTYLE

Feelings of Vulnerability Skyrocket After Targeted Ads Suggest Both Laxatives and Velveeta

You turn on your favorite trash TV show—the perfect episode that will allow you to scroll on social media for the entirety of it. I…

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Posted in LIFESTYLE

10+ Things My Upstairs Neighbor Is Doing to Make Me Question If the Ceiling Is Going to Fall Through

Being in tight quarters in New York City has always been the norm. You’re so on top of each other that you have this strange…

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Posted in LIFESTYLE

“A Pandemic is Bad, But a Zombie Apocalypse Would Be Way Worse” Insists Highly Intoxicated Roommate

LOS ANGELES- While watching Night of the Living Dead last Wednesday night after drinking an entire bottle of cheap Rosé, thirty-three year old Haley Hendricks…

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Posted in LIFESTYLE

I Tried to Fill My Quarantine With Self-Care and Productivity, But Then I Remembered I Have a Child

As I crumple into bed late at night, mindlessly scrolling Instagram to keep my finger from the “News” section, I notice that there are two…

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Posted in FASHION LIFESTYLE

Blissfully Unaware Basic Bitch Says She’s Most Thankful for Her Ombre Hair During This Pandemic

My mom bought me a gratitude journal for Christmas. Supes subtle, Mom, THANKS. But a month into quarantine, I’ve decided to actually use it. Because…

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Posted in EW MEN LIFESTYLE LOVE

The Instacart Delivery Guy’s Direct Eye Contact Means He Wants to Marry Me, Right?

The simplest answer is often the best answer, right? Well after much deductive reasoning, I’ve come to the straightforward conclusion that the Instacart guy who…

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