As the seasons change, so should your crying spots. Growing weary of sobbing inside her own house, mommy blogger Chelsea Smith reached out to her 30k Facebook fans to crowdsource the best places to cry outside. The most common replies included at the park, walking the dog, and in the Chick fil-A drive-thru.
Smith went back to her fans again for a more specific query, “Some of us were lucky enough to have a pool to cry by this summer, but the days are shorter and colder, and I want places to shed tears in chunky sweaters and tall boots. Need ideas!”
The submissions poured in, including apple orchards, pumpkin patches, bonfires, cemeteries (woah, too dark). But the clear winner was the corn maze.
The corn maze is perfect because it offers everything you look for in a good cry spot; the corn creates a barrier from the wind blasting cold air onto your tear-stained cheeks, you have separation from strangers, and being able to walk and weep is a bonus.
“The best part is you’ll be supporting a local farm with the purchase of your ticket whether you cry or not, and corn is naturally gluten-free,” Chelsea explained.
Which corn maze is right for you? There are a few styles to choose from, so do your research before you go. There’s the traditional Ikea-style that leads you around every corner of the maze and has several dead ends. Others take the crop circle approach and are only visible from the sky. If you’re fortunate enough to cry from a small plane, you could see the corn maze in Northern California designed to look like Lizzo’s cover of Vogue. The most popular celebrity by far – whose likeness has graced hundreds of corn mazes – is Dale Earnhardt. If we have been visited by aliens, they’re sure to know the phrase, “Raise Hell, Praise Dale.”
Many of our favorite fall festivities have been canceled, but corn mazes were practically made for social distancing. Laurie Hill from Illinois knows first-hand what crying in a corn maze can do for your psyche. She’s wept in the world’s largest corn maze with over 60 acres to get lost in your sadness.
“Once I was done crying, I realized I was actually lost, and that made me cry for a different reason, which was refreshing in a weird way.”
Women like Laurie have limited places to cry in public, much less open-air, but corn mazes provide the perfect setting for wandering aimlessly in your despair this season. Enjoy!