How to Find New Friends When None of Yours Want to Talk About Bling Empire

Making friends as an adult is hard. Even harder? Tracking down friends who share your deep interest in Bling Empire. But just like Cherie didn’t give up in her quest to get engaged by the end of the season, you cannot give up in your quest for a group of people who understand your passion! Follow these steps, and you’ll be on your way to a better life, just like Kevin, the fish out of water Philly transplant who lucked into a glamorous life among new rich friends in LA.

First, Ditch Your Old Friends

You gave your old friends a shot, just like Anna gave Christine a shot even though they were both vying for the role of group queen. But some things—like wearing the same diamond necklace to a party, or refusing to gossip about Bling Empire—simply cannot be forgiven. Remember when, in an act of retribution, Anna put Christine’s table setting all the way at the other end of the dinner party table? Similarly, you have to put some distance between you and your old friends who you’ve outgrown. And if they want to show remorse for their neglect of the best reality TV show of the year, it’s on them to initiate.

Tap Into Your Network

If you want to find new friends, first use the connections you already have. Maybe one of your colleagues knows somebody who knows somebody who has binged season one of Bling Empire and has possibly even begun a re-watch. (With a show as complex and meaty as this one, imagine all the easter eggs you can pick up a second time around!) As Kane describes on the show, everyone in LA’s Asian billionaire culture knows each other, so word travels quickly. Hopefully, if you keep sowing seeds by telling all your friends about your extremely niche interest, you can form that same sort of tight network among Bling Empire superfans.

Find an Online Community

If you’re having trouble socializing with potential new friends, turn to the internet. Surely there are subreddits and chat rooms dedicated to discourse on the franchise. As you know, Kevin had to get super resourceful when trying to track down his birth parents, which is why he eventually turned to a hypnotherapist. If you want new friends, you have to use all the tools at your disposal. If you want an outlet to vocalize your need for a season 2, you need to find people who will amplify your voice on this very important issue. Harness the strength of the internet!  

Start a Meet-Up Group

Once you identify other people out there who share your fiery passion for Bling Empire, make an effort to meet up on a regular basis. Just like the producers of the show clearly orchestrate all those contrived social events to get TV fodder, you have to be purposeful and organized about your group’s social programming. 

If you’re not sure what kind of events to throw, just rewatch season one for ideas. Maybe hire a stripper to pretend to lead a yoga class; or take a private jet to Vegas for the day. You could even sneak into each other’s houses and throw sex toys out the window. As long as you leave toxic creeps like Andrew out of the equation, anything goes! 

And if you don’t get these references, I’m sorry but I don’t have space for you in my life right now!

Image: Netflix 

Mary Gulino
Author: Mary Gulino
Mary is an LA-based writer from New Jersey whose work can be seen online and on TV (unless you count streaming platforms as online, in which case, it's all online). She got glasses when she was two, and would love to talk optometry sometime.