What? How? Why? Who? These are the questions that entered our collective hive mind when we learned of this groundbreaking shift in reality. Somehow, against all odds, this woman has done the impossible. She’s entered a relationship with a man.
Sarah Brooks, a 24-year-old veterinarian’s assistant from Western Connecticut, is reportedly dating Dylan Sanders, AKA some guy. In a gushing Instagram post, Sarah memorialized the first month of their relationship with a series of selfies and emojis.
“One month with this goof! Words cannot even describe how much you’ve meant to me in the last four weeks. Through our ups and downs, our fights, our victories, you’ve been with me through it all! Here’s to another two fortnights with this King!” And then a full row of heart emojis.
It should be worth noting that Dylan did not like or comment on the post, despite being tagged in it. Which begs the question: what is going on in this relationship? We reached out to Sarah for comment.
“Oh, Dylan has been a total rock throughout this whole month. We met in line at Trader Joe’s. He looked super cute in his mask, plus it wasn’t covering his nose so I could see like, most of his face. So I knew what I was getting into,” Sarah told us.
Dylan responded to our questions about their meet-cute with a simple, “Oh IDK hahaha. Brooke? She’s hot. We hooked up in my car.”
Despite their recounting of the relationship’s beginning not quite lining up, it’s just a miracle that these two souls found each other. “I’m basically in love,” Sarah told us. “I’ve never felt this way about anyone. And it’s not just because of the pandemic loneliness. I seriously love that he’s in a Red Hot Chilli Peppers cover band. That’s hot to me now. It’s not a red flag, it’s a sign he’s the one!”
When we asked Dylan what he thought about Sarah, he responded with another simple “LOL. I’m seeing like three girls right now it’s kind of hard to keep up. Is Sarah the blonde one?”
Wow! Love wins!
If you’re lucky enough to be in a committed, mature relationship like these two lovebirds are, hold on tight and never let go. Because in these unprecedented times, who knows when the next time someone will love you will be? Oh, God. I have to go lie down. I’m done with this article, I’m sad now.