Retail Therapy: This Sweater Will Definitely Fix All Your Emotional Issues!
I know you’re broke. It was just the holiday season, and your friends and family expected you to prove your love and affection for them…
Men Make Movies About War So They Don’t Have to Cast Women
Let me preface this by saying I haven’t seen 1917, and I don’t want to. A tweet by comedian Joel Kim Booster summarizes what I…
Wow! This Woman Drinks 8 Cups of Water a Day and She’s Still Sad!
Doctors recommend that adults drink half a gallon of water per day for optimal hydration. The health benefits of staying adequately hydrated are manifold—it boosts…
New Study Shows Liza Minnelli Has Always Looked Like That
Stars are just like us- they put their age on one year at a time. Except for one: Liza Minnelli. Researchers at the National Institutes…
Almond Milk Sues for Rights
Dairy farmers everywhere share a common dream: a wholesome lifestyle spent milking their cows each day, filling up buckets of milk and making enough to…
NYC Comedians Combat Domestic Violence Through New “Violently Funny” Podcast
According to The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, 1 in 3 women have experienced some form of physical violence by an intimate partner. It was…
How to Survive the Holidays as a Childless Queer
It’s the most wonderful time of the year! At least for those of us who are passive aggressive and slightly to completetly problematic. For the…
BREAKING: Barista Wants You to Go Fuck Yourself
According to witnesses, the barista at your local indie café wants you to get the hell out of his face. He can tell that you…
Now That You’ve Taken a Bite…Guess What Horrible Ingredient The Party Host Snuck Into Your Food!
With the surge of food allergies and unique dietary needs, more and more establishments are becoming transparent about what they put in their food. That…
9/10 Dentist Agree: Brushing Your Teeth To the Power Rangers Song is Cool as Hell
Candles flicker and drills whir. Gurgles and spits of ages past, present, and future echo through chambers filled with reclining chairs and old magazines. A…
