Blissfully Unaware Basic Bitch Says She’s Most Thankful for Her Ombre Hair During This Pandemic
My mom bought me a gratitude journal for Christmas. Supes subtle, Mom, THANKS. But a month into quarantine, I’ve decided to actually use it. Because…
Convicted Serial Killer Is Awkwardly Not a Tidy, Misunderstood Hottie
We’re coming live to you from convicted serial killer Justin Timmon’s house in the outskirts of rural Indiana. Justin is holed up in his duplex…
Collect Bugs and Declare Yourself Mayor: How to Play Animal Crossing in Real Life
The fervor for Nintendo’s latest chill-out simulator, Animal Crossing: New Horizons has reached a fever pitch online. Old fans and new fans can’t get enough…
Board Games That Will Make You Feel Rich While You’re Unemployed
Ah, the rich. The enviable 1% with their multiple estates and fancy cars. The lucky few who are already fattened enough that they will likely…
The Instacart Delivery Guy’s Direct Eye Contact Means He Wants to Marry Me, Right?
The simplest answer is often the best answer, right? Well after much deductive reasoning, I’ve come to the straightforward conclusion that the Instacart guy who…
Concerned Amazon Cart Stages a Panic Buying Intervention
Hello, How are you coping in quarantine? Just kidding, I already know. This is your Amazon cart here. Sorry, this isn’t about the status of…
Free Tacos and TV?! A Guide to Quarantine Freebies
The world is in a never ending game of hot lava. Hot Lava is what I’m calling quarantine, by the way, go ahead and try…
Spam and Karaoke! 6 Ways to Celebrate API Heritage Month in Quarantine
It’s May! HAPPY ASIAN AND PACIFIC ISLANDER AMERICAN HERITAGE MONTH! It’s hard to feel celebratory with all APAH-love events of past years being cancelled and the…
Thousands of Protesters Across The Country Try To Figure Out What Exactly They Are Protesting
Americans rally in the streets from coast-to-coast. Even Ohio and Michigan, two states famous for never getting any action, are getting in on the action….
Dying Grandma Won’t Allow Visitors Because She “Doesn’t Look Hot”
Listen, sweetie, your ma told me you want to go visit nanna… The doctors don’t know yet. They’re doing tests. Tests, lots of tests. Let’s…
